Carolyn's Critters

Dear Elsa,
I love your pretty pink nose and your pretty pink beans!
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
My beans???????
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
The neat round little pink pads on your feet. They look like beans.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
I think it’s strange to refer to cat paw pads like they are food. I’m not edible!!!
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. I think cat paw pads are sweet!
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Mine are the prettiest paws.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I don’t know about that. Winston has beautiful glossy black beans.  
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Well, ok. Charlie has both – pink beans, with black on his palms.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I guess Charlie never made up his mind which way he was going to go with them. Pink or black.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum.
I don’t think that’s what happened.
Love, Elsa 

Dear Elsa,
Sure it is. He never finished making them pink. That’s SO Charlie. Just like he never finished the white on his nose.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Seriously?
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Not at all, sweetie, I’m just kidding around.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Do dogs have beans? Poppy’s paws are so rough.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa
Good question. How are we defining beans? 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Defining beans? That sounds so science-y!!!
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Science-y?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
We’re talking about definitions. Very science-y! I like that!!!
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Well, I like it that you are interested in science. So about the definition, I think beans are a cat thing. Smooth and glossy. Dog pads are something entirely different.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
They aren’t refined and perfect like our paws.  And no one does pink better than I do.
Love, Elsa

– 

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Dear Mom,
Do we all get to have some of the stuff you shared with Charlie?
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
The stuff? What stuff are you talking about?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
The Tele stuff you were telling your friend about. That Charlie got from you when he was playing with Miss Mousie.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
You mean telepathy?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
That’s it! We want some of that stuff too.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
It isn’t really stuff. It’s a form of communication.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
You were all excited about it.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
It was a very interesting moment! Remember how, earlier this year, Charlie kept dropping his Mousies into the water dishes?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
Mostly Miss Mousie. The big one. Plopped her right into the water bowl. Cats are so weird.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Well, we all agree on that. But anyway, he did that for a while and then he stopped. He hasn’t done that for months. So, this morning I walked into the kitchen and saw Miss Mousie lying in the middle of the floor.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
The cats have a lot of toys. All over the house. Especially mousies.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
It’s always nice to have a mousie handy, right? 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
This whole story is about Miss Mousie lying in the middle of the floor?
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
No, there’s more. The water bowl was nearby, and that reminded me of the water dunking Charlie used to do. Just as I was reminded of that, Charlie entered the room.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
This is a long story.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
But it’s a good one. Hang on. So, as I was remembering Charlie’s odd dunking game, as I had a picture of it in my mind, I flipped the mousie playfully in the air for him. As one does.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
Charlie always loves that!
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
He does! So he went to Miss Mousie and picked her up. And then he walked right over to the water bowl and DROPPED HER IN.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
And?
Poppy

Dear Poppy,
He did exactly what I had pictured in my mind. And that sure seems like telepathy.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
I think it just seems like a long story about a soggy mousie.
XOXO Poppy

– 

A note to our readers…

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Hey Mom,
I took Winston’s spot on your lap and he gave me his Death Stare. So I yelled at him.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
He thinks he owns my lap when I sit on the sofa. Clearly I’m very predictable. I go to the TV, turn on the news, then go to the kitchen to pour a glass of wine, and when I return to watch the news, Winston is there waiting for me. He knows my habits.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
We all know your habits. But when he leaves his spot, he loses it. And I take my turn. I just ignore his dirty looks.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
It’s to your credit that you usually defer to him as the Senior Cat, when it comes to his Spot.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
He has other Spots.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
You all do. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Another one of Winston’s Spots is to sit on the back of the sofa. And also the cat bed on the ottoman.
Charlie

Dear Charlie
Elsa has two Spots. She practically lives full time under the bed, but she comes out to sit on the window sill when no one is looking.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Poppy has Spots too! Two beds and the rug in the kitchen. But that doesn’t show much creativity. Poppy’s are designated for her. We cats put a lot of thought into ours.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
Are all Cat Households this regulated? Everyone here has their reserved Spot. Is there a Cat Spot Registry somewhere?
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Is that sarcasm?
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
Yes, good for you for recognizing it. So, other than stealing Poppy’s bed, what are your Spots?
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I’m too busy for that.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
I guess so. Working the windows takes time, racing from window to window to keep up with bird activity and passing neighbors.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
It’s a lot to keep track of.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
It is. And then you just nap wherever you end up.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
It’s a good system.
Charlie 

– 

A note to our readers…
Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Mom,
The bed attacked me!
Winston

Dear Winston,
No, that was Charlie, when you crawled under the sheets while I was trying to change them. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I was TRAPPED!!!!
Winston

Dear Winston,
Not really. You just somehow got yourself wrapped in the sheet. And Charlie totally took advantage of the situation and pounced right on you. I’m sorry that made you panic. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
It was HORRIFYING!
Winston

Dear Winston,
It was just a sheet, honey. But I understand. You got tangled. And you totally panicked when Charlie landed on top of you. I did feel badly for you! 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
You laughed.
Winston

Dear Winston,
Ok, I did, but it was sort of an accidental snort.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I couldn’t get out!!!!!
Winston

Dear Winston,
But I lifted the sheet and saved you! And see? You’re ok now, right?
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I was so worried. I ran out of the room. I yelled SCURITY SCURITY!!!!!
Winston

Dear Winston,
So, were you saying Scurry Scurry? Like run really fast? Or Security Security? You do know that we live in a very safe environment here, and we don’t need to call Security, right? 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Thank god we have Poppy for that!
Winston

Dear Winston,
I’m not sure Poppy is really what we’d call a Security Dog.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
You mean we have NOTHING to protect us?
Winston

Dear Winston,
We have neighbors on all sides, all ready to save us if we need it.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Does Poppy know that?
Winston

Dear Winston,
We won’t tell her. We’ll let her continue to think she’s in charge of security.
Love, Carolyn

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Dear Elsa,
The vet’s office sent me a text reminding me that it is time for you and Charlie to come in for your annual visit. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
What did you tell them?
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I made an appointment for Charlie, and told them I’d see what I can do about you. We’ve already cancelled two appointments because I couldn’t pick you up to put you in a carrier.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
We’re not going there.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Honey, what are we going to do with you? 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Not going to happen.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
We went there last year. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
I was a baby KITTEN then. I’m an adult now, and NO ONE is allowed to pick me up.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I understand. It’s not a choice, it’s a feral trigger. You won’t even let me pick you up for a loving cuddle! I can’t carry you into the room where I take your pictures. I’m not even allowed to reach out to you with both hands. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Two hands means picking up.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I get that. But it’s sad. Because you are such a love bug! You even let me rub your belly. Most cats I’ve lived with considered the belly to be off limits. You are so trusting, there’s not a spot on your body that I’m not allowed to touch. It’s all very frustrating, because you are so hungry for affection.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
I’m not doing this on purpose!
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I get it. So, I told the vet that you are triggered from your feral babyhood, and that I’d need a tranquilizer dart to be able to pick you up, let alone get you into a carrier. And then she suggested that I leave the carrier out all the time so that you can get used to it. That just made me laugh.  
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
The carrier has been sitting right here for months. 
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
She was trying to be helpful, but I told her the carrier isn’t the problem. The trigger is the problem. She was very sympathetic, but said she can’t prescribe gabapentin without weighing you first. But that if you were to have a health issue, she knows a vet who makes house calls.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
You mean a stranger would come into our house?!!!
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Good point. That would mean having to somehow extricate you out from under the bed.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
I’m in charge of my life.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa, 
Ouf. I respect that attitude, but you sure make things difficult.
Love, Carolyn

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Dear Poppy,
I have a request, sweetie. Can you please leave the cat toys alone?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
Why do the cats need so many toys?
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Because if they have plenty of toys to keep them occupied, they don’t knock over the lamps. I call it lamp insurance.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
But I don’t really play with the cat toys.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
You may not play with them, but now you’re destroying them. First the purple mousie, and now the blue mousie.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
Those were accidents. 
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Accidents? You shredded them!
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
They smelled irresistible.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Can’t it stop there? Can’t you just enjoy the lovely smell? 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
I do!
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
But then you shred them to bits.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
And this is wrong because…???
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Honey, the cats want to play with their mousie toys. No one has any use for a pile of shredded fabric and stuffing.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
So why are these things made with a scent that makes me chew them up? 
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
That must be the catnip. I didn’t know dogs were interested in that. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
So, just smell them? You mean no touch? Just smell?
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Yes! Exactly! I’m so glad you understand.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
But I don’t!!!! That makes no sense. You can’t just sniff without acting on the scent.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Sure you can. I do that all the time. I like to sniff a Meyer Lemon. Or a lavender flower. Or a crushed sprig of rosemary. But I stop there! No shredding involved.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
You just said you crushed a sprig. And you picked the flower. You destroy things!
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Ok, you got me there. On a technicality. But still, when I enjoy a smell there’s no shredding involved.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mom,
Because you are not a dog.
XOXO Poppy

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Mom,
It’s time for The Game.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
I know, sweetie. Give me a minute, I’m in the middle of something.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I saw you put your coffee cup in the sink. That means you are ready for The Game.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
As usual you’re on the mark. Give me a minute.
Love, Carolyn

MOM,
IT’S TIME FOR THE GAME!!!!!!!!!
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
You can stop yelling, we’re going to play. Who knew what a hit this wand toy would be.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
I love watching you play with it!
Love, Carolyn 

Mom,
It’s not play.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
You’re right. It’s something else altogether. You leap so high, you are eye-level with me! Maybe I should call you Air Charlie. And while you are airborne, sometimes you change direction so fast that a leap turns into a flip!  What an athlete you are! 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I love it when you yell WOO HOO!!!!
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
I love it when you jump so high that it calls for a Woo Hoo! What an extraordinary performance. Hey, I’ve got an even better name for you – I’m going to start calling you Charlie BaryshniKat.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
That’s a weird name.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
No, it’s an honor, to be named after one of the greatest dancers in the world. You have the athleticism, the grace, and the beauty of a great ballet dancer.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Does that guy catch the prey like I do?
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
No one catches it like you do. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
It’s a very tricky prey.
Charlie

Dear Charlie,
But somehow you catch that thing while you are up in the air! And I love the ritual after you catch it, when we walk around the house with the prey in your mouth, me following you, holding the wand like a leash!
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
That’s part of the game.
Charlie

Dear Charlie
I get it. Kind of like a victory lap. Or maybe it’s an instinct to cache your prey. Puffin did that too, when he played with his wand. When he caught his prey, he walked it to a specific spot where he put it down on the rug. Every time. When you catch it we take a tour of the house, making a big circle to end up back where we started.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Ready for the next round.
Charlie

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Mom,
Did you mean it today when you said you were going to get rid of all your cats?????
Winston

Dear Winston,
Oh dear, I’m sorry honey, I should be careful about what I say. I was just exasperated about the beans.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
The beans????
Winston

Dear Winston
I picked some green beans in my garden, and left them on the counter because I was planning to have them with dinner tonight. And they all disappeared.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Charlie was playing with one of them.
Winston

Dear Winston,
Charlie was playing with all of them. I found one in the water bowl. Full of puncture marks. I haven’t found the others yet.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I think they are under the sofa.
Winston

Dear Winston,
Good to know.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I’m glad you’re not planning to get rid of us.
Winston

Dear Winston,
I’m so sorry, I forget how literal you all are. I would NEVER get rid of you kids. You are my sweet family!
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Sometimes I’m not sure. You screamed at me this morning.
Winston

Dear Winston,
I SNEEZED, sweetie. That wasn’t a scream. There was no need to race out of the room with body language that yelled WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Sometimes I just have to be sure.
Winston

Dear Winston,
You are such a worrier. I feel badly for you. How did you become such an anxious cat? 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Am I supposed to know the answer to that?
Winston

Dear Winston,
It wasn’t really a question. I’m sure your poor vision has something to do with it. And I think you must have had a tough beginning before you were rescued. You were so tiny when we adopted you that it’s hard to imagine what went on before that.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I don’t remember!!!!!
Winston

Dear Winston,
That’s ok. We had an opening for an Anxious Cat and you filled the position perfectly.
Love, Carolyn

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Dear Mum,
Who is Mukluk?
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
That’s a term of endearment, sweetie. I call all of you my Mukluks.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
You have a lot of names for us.
Love, Elsa,

Dear Elsa,
I do. I find it entertaining. I hope you don’t mind.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
I don’t mind. It’s just one of the ways humans are weird. Even our mousie toys have names. 
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
I guess this new one must be Blue Mousie.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
I hope Poppy doesn’t get hold of it.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
She is trouble, isn’t she! Too bad about Purple Mousie. She really tucked into that thing and shredded it to bits in no time. This one is from the same package. Apparently they have catnip in them, so I wonder if that’s what attracted her to it. 
Love, Carolyn 

Dear Mum,
She shouldn’t be playing with my toys.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
You’re right of course. But who can resist such exciting prey.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
The only thing better is live prey! 
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Like bugs! You and Charlie are really on top of the bug situation. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
Yup. Bugs are one of the best kinds of prey. 
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
Hopefully we don’t have other live prey in our house. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
There’s the creature on the ceiling.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
The WHAT?
Love, Carolyn

Dear Mum,
The creature with the green eye on the bedroom ceiling.
Love, Elsa

Dear Elsa,
The smoke alarm. Glad someone is keeping an eye on it. 
Love, Carolyn

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!

Mom,
You were yelling at the TV again.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
I’m sorry. That probably makes you wonder what’s going on. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Yes!!! What was it all about?
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
I was just reacting to the news.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
You said some bad words too. 
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
Well, it doesn’t have anything to do with you, so you don’t need to worry about it.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
We all want you to be happy.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
You are so sweet!
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Because if you are happy, everyone is happy.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
I have to say that’s perceptive of you.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
Sometimes at night you get annoyed with Charlie and Winston. 
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
You mean like last night when the two of them wouldn’t stop wrestling.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
It was a real commotion. Elsa and I don’t ever do that!
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
It didn’t help that they were crashing around right on top of me. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
And on me!!!!!! They fell off the bed, smack onto me while I was sound asleep on the rug!!!!! 
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
You poor girl, that was a rough way to wake up. You sprang to your feet screaming.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
So I was glad when you yelled “That’s it!!! Out you go!!!” And evicted those boys.
XOXO Poppy

Dear Poppy,
They didn’t care one bit. They just continued their crazy wrestling and zoomies together in the rest of the house.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
And our room was quiet and happy and snuggly with Team Girls!
XOXO Poppy

– 

A note to our readers…

Please subscribe! It’s free, and with a subscription you’ll get these weekly posts delivered right to your In Box. You’ll find the subscription link at the top of the page (If you are reading this in an email, go to https://carolynscritters.blog/ to subscribe.)  When you do, Poppy, Winston, Charlie and Elsa will all raise their paws to salute you!